woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize