You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
