Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
