Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
