he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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