so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
