How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I think a kid would responsible me up
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
