You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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