you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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