whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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