dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize
