The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
she peed on how many people?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
