question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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