so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
