You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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