I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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