Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
