Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
