You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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