Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
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