that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
