I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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