i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
