We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
soo... how was my night?
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