At least make sure they are 18
Why
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
