Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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