In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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