Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
