ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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