why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
