hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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