I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
