why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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