using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
