what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize
