Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
My vagina is very pro this idea
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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