OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
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