3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
