and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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