Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
