Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
