CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
