They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize