You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
