I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
