I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
