he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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