in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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