Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Come share oat with me in your robe
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
