He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
