so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
