Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
